Dear Anxiety – Raising Awareness

I wrote this letter to my anxiety about 6 years ago, before we lost Poppy. My anxiety is still with me, something I have grown to understand will always be a part of me. In ways it has grown massively yet in other ways maybe I have grown to find my coping strategies with help from Poppy.

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Baby Loss and Grief Journal – Writing through loss

The Baby Loss and Grief Journal has been created to help grieving parents navigate their thoughts, feelings and complex emotions through writing. I personally have found writing to be a huge channel for my own grief. I therefore wanted to gift this form of therapy to others.

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The Power of 100 – Distraction Technique – Baby Loss and Grief

There are times in life when you are just broken. Times where everything is spiralling and you just have no control over anything. This is exactly where I was in the lead up to losing Poppy. In the weeks where we were going through Poppy’s diagnosis our lives were full of tests, scans, appointments and pure fear. I was beyond scared, I was beyond being able to cope. This is when I needed a coping strategy for scans, procedures, waiting in the horrendous side rooms, meetings. And to just survive. For me this is where the power of 100 started.

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A Letter to my Angel Baby – Early Miscarriage

On the 18th March 2017 we began our journey of loss. We started to miscarry Poppy’s big brother or sister. I was petrified, I was heartbroken, I was a mess. No matter how small our babies are, they are still our babies and will always be. I didn’t know that this was going to be the start of a very long and hard life shattering journey. But I always keep our precious little one tucked away in a special place in my heart. I didn’t have any memories to hold onto – no scans or anything physical, so I wrote a letter to my angel baby.

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To My Earth Side Children; I’m Sorry

To my earth side children; I’m sorry…

I’m sorry for not being the Mummy that I dreamt that I would be for you. I never imagined that motherhood would bring me so much pain. I struggle everyday to be the best Mummy I can be for you. To be a Mummy to children in both heaven and earth is a struggle every single day.

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After Psychotherapy – Baby Loss, Grief and Trauma

It took me a long time to accept therapy after losing Poppy. Two years after losing Poppy I hit a really bad place. At this point I needed to ask for help and my GP and Bereavement Midwife were incredible. My Bereavement Midwife was so relieved that I finally asked for the therapy sessions. She refereed me straight away for Psychotherapy.

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I will sit with you in the darkness…

I will sit with you in the darkness as I never want anyone to be alone. Baby Loss can bring so many complex emotions. No one should ever feel alone, isolated or scared by themselves. Finding the support you need is so important.

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When there is no reason… My Baby Loss Story

Losing your baby is hard. Beyond hard. Every families journey is different and some get answers whilst others have no answers at all. I’m not sure which is easier though? Not that any part of baby loss is easy. Being given an answer as to why our babies couldn’t stay with us or when there is no reason at all.

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The Story Behind the Photo – Our journey of love and loss

I don’t usually share photos of my family. Below you will find a photo of myself and my family where we are happy and smiling on holiday. I felt I needed to share the story behind my family photo to show how important it is that images we see can reflect the wrong story. You’ll often find that the reality is very different to what the eye can see.

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